Belated Monday Quote of the Week

Someone's phone just vibrate. Actually that was my butt.

Tip of the day

Call your parents and tell them you love them.

The Perfect Girl

Most hormone filled guys constantly have their eyes open for a possible girlfriend, it's instinct.  While we’re still young, we’re looking for the dream girl.  The dream girl is different for every person, but I feel like in college we don’t compromise in looking for our dream girl.  After college, we might make a few concessions.  Furthermore, if we’re 33 and still single, we’ve compromised enough that’s we’re just trying to mate to continue to our family name.  But, I digress.  We’re talking about the dream girl.

Rose-Colored Glasses - One of the best things about meeting a new girl is that they have no personality flaws.  There’s so much mystery to them, that we don’t imagine personality flaws we just imagine what we want, filling in the gaps with ideal hopes.  And on top of that, if the new girl we meet passes the physical description of dream girl (once again different for every guy), we put on the rose-colored glasses.

Hooked - After the rose-colored glasses are put on, the girl can do no wrong.  There isn’t anything she can say that will hamper our opinion of her.  I mean she started out a dream girl, and she’ll stay that way for a little bit.  So you might make some small talk, and she’ll say something about herself.  Most of the time it doesn’t matter what she says, but you’ll feel like she said the perfect thing.  Your heart will start racing and you’ll think, “She’s perfect for me.”  She could say something as simple as oh I love skiing, and instantly you’re hooked.

About 9 strikes - After the rose-colored glasses and the hook, the dream girl becomes a baseball inning with about 9 strikes.  Once the guy is hooked, it will take multiple efforts from the girl to deter him.  I mean you started out as the dream girl, and he felt like there’s a connection, so he’ll hang around for a little while for sure, I mean it takes awhile to get up to 9 strikes.

Guys, continue to dream big, but know that you embellish what you don’t know about the girl.  And girls, tread softly for you tread on our dreams.

Easiest Classes at UVA

This might have been significantly more helpful if I had posted this when people were signing up for classes, but oh well, there’s always next semester…for some of us.  I believe I have enough validity to write about this subject because how I view class scheduling.

Some people take classes they’re interested in.  Some people take the easy way out.  I’m the latter, and have taken quite a selection of gut classes in my time here.  (“Gut” means easy)  Some people would rather get a B and feel as if they’ve really learned something, I’d rather have an A and not know anything about the class a month later.  I don’t believe what you learn in class is that applicable later.  A college diploma means that graduate is trainable and how you get that diploma isn’t too important.  If you can pass college level classes, it tells a company you can be trained to operate in the real world.  So here are the five easiest classes I took at UVA:

1         COMM 180 – Introduction to Business – Taught by Robert Kemp, who has a billion stories about China, Japan, drinking with colleagues, and so forth and so on.  The tests are similar to a vocabulary test, and are all multiple choice.  He’ll convince you you’ll need to get the Wall Street Journal.  Don’t.  Resist it just like when you’ll tell your mechanic you just want an oil change and not every fluid imaginable in your car changed.

2         ASTR 121 – Sky and Solar System – I took this class without buying the book.  I only took notes when the professor wrote it on the board (Best advice “ratemyprofessor.com” has ever given me).  The tests are fairly easy, especially if you like math and science.  Make sure you go to the outdoor lab where you will find the coolest laser pointer known to man.

3         COMM 331 – Commercial Law -- Don’t waste your time buying the book.  Just come to class and pay attention to the examples, most of them involve drinking anyway.  The tests are open note, but not like science open note where the answer isn’t in your notes.  In this class, all your answers are in your notes, so just print off the notes before the test, and use common sense.

4         DRAM 208 – History of the Circus – Most entertaining gut class ever.  You’ll quickly realize this class is really easy when 4 defense starters on the football team walk in the first day.  We watched 30 minutes of video clips minimum per class.  I got free tickets to the circus in Richmond, and we had clowns give a performance in class.  It’s just too entertaining.  It meets some historical study requirement, and you only have 2 tests to take, and no papers.

5         EVSC 101 – Introduction to Environmental Science – Tom Smith is a boss.  He literally wore exactly what I would wear to class.  Jeans and a full zip black hoodie.  I didn’t buy the book, just ran through the Powerpoints before the test.  It’s a very skippable class.

Fun fact: none of these classes met on a Friday, so if you research hard enough on class scheduling you can have your cake and eat it too.

FOMO's

You’re in college and you want to have the most fun.  You’re free to do anything and have no limits.  You want to be plugged in to everything that’s happening because god forbid, you miss out on a fun time.  You’re disappointed when somewhere else fun is happening, and you’re not there.  There’s a lot of these people running around, and I like to call them FOMO’s, (fear of missing out-ers).

Non-committal - These are the people that never commit to anything.  They stay on the fence and don’t want to be tied down by one activity.  They’re constantly waiting and hoping that something better will come along and they won’t miss out.  As a first year, these people constantly wander the halls just checking on what other people are doing, sort of monitoring.  If you ask them if they have any plans, they’ll say “no plans, just seeing what’s going on?”  In the worst case, I’ve heard FOMOs explain how they use their free time with only wishy washy philosophical jargon: “I’m really spontaneous, and love having spontaneous fun, like if you said let’s go camping tonight, I would totally do it” 

Rant on spontaneity - Here’s a quick rant at those philosophical types.  There aren’t enough people or opportunities to sustain spontaneous fun all the time.  You can have really fun spontaneous days, but most days, spontaneous people sit waiting around for something to happen, just waiting.  Everyone else has some type of schedule they use to keep their life straight.  Maybe you should too.

First year FOMO’s (FYFOMO's) - Many first years are scared to commit a day, an afternoon, or a weekend to something.  They’re scared they’ll miss something at UVA.  They’re scared that while they’re away, so much fun will happen, so many better things will take place and they’ll be outside the fun circle.  Reality check, most weekends at college are about the same.  Seen one, seen them all (exception: Halloween).  The weekend you give up can be replaced by a basically identical experience the next weekend.  But that special weekend commitment doesn’t happen every weekend.  You don’t a second chance at that.  Be committal and adventurous and do something different, even if you have to give up your whole weekend, because honestly a standard weekend at college is not as valuable as you think.

Opportunity Cost - These FOMO’s live their lives constantly searching for the next thing instead of enjoying the present as much as they should.  It’s hard to look at a situation and constantly say that this is best option for me, that this is the most fun, that there is no place I’d rather be than right here.  But if you can do that or at least act like it, if you can honestly be happy about where you are all the time, you’ll be a whole lot more fun to be around.

Spacey - Another problem with FOMOs is that they are not much fun to be around, they never give you their undivided attention.  Their fun radar is constantly searching for maximizing fun, so their eyes and minds wander as they converse with you, and then you just feel disrespected.  Stop worrying about missing out, most of the time the thing you’re doing is the best option, so give it your full attention and others will enjoy your company a lot more.

So, don’t be a FOMO, commit to things, and give each situation your full attention.

Who does more work?

In college we run into friends in passing all the time.  Between classes, at the dining hall, out on the town, a bunch of different places.  Most quick conversations go something like this.  One person asks how the other is doing.  The other complains about the work they have.  The first person gives their condolences and then counters with their own complaints about their work.  Most of the time they don’t even wait until the question has been re-asked.  Misery has company.  Here’s a novel idea and a true challenge to most:  Don’t talk about all the work you have to do, talk about something else.

If you actually accept this challenge, you’ll quickly realize how much (or how little) you complain about work.  You realize how much of the conversation was spent talking about papers, projects, and teachers.

We all go to UVA, we all have homework.  Let’s not be competitive about who has it worse.  Let’s not go around complaining and comparing workloads.  Don’t think and complain about having a paper due and an exam on the same day, think about how lucky you are that you’re getting a degree from college.  Think about how you’re slated to earn a million more dollars in your career than a non-collegian.  Think about how fortunate you are to spend four years in college around some of the coolest people you’ll ever meet.  Think about all those things, and then decide if having 3 exams in 2 days is worth complaining about to someone you only see once a week.

If we stop talking about the work we have to do, we can start talking about each other’s actual life.  Because in real friendships, you talk about more things than whether or not they’ll make a 5 PM deadline for that 12 page paper.  Once we stop talking about our work, we can talk about how we’re really doing.  About how we’re feeling, about our family, about our friends, about our experiences, about the things that actually matter.

Jorts--An American Tradition

So I scanned the internet for an article supporting wearing jorts.  Funny thing, I couldn’t find any, so I wrote my own.  From all the negative stereotyping, it’s possible that standard jorts-wearing people don’t waste time writing articles to an audience of 4, but I do.

What are Jorts?  Before I delve into the deep political, economical, and social benefits of jorts, I need to quickly define what is and what are not jorts.  Jorts are denim jeans that were first long legged.  But, after some wear, enough to break in the jeans, the owner decides to cut them off.  There is much debate as to the proper location to cut the jeans, but the best length is 3-4 inches above the knee, and it has to be above the knee; if you’re looking for a tailor I recommend Kevin Carter.  When cutting, make sure to take your time and use a sharp knife or scissors to keep the fray under control.  You’re hoping for a snug feel and the freedom to let your knees breathe beneath a small fray.

When can I wear them?  Seeing people in jorts is definitely a privilege, especially since it’s hard to pull it off in the standard public, especially if you’re looking to be employable in a few months.  To wear jorts you need three things:  Friends, America and Beer.  Luckily that’s not too restrictive, but it does cancel out class.  Here are a few great examples of when jorts are acceptable and possibly encouraged.  Playing corn-hole on the weekend.  Going to a theme-party.  Going Camping.  Going to your first NASCAR race.  Riding an ATV.  The goal when wearing jorts is to be outside in America with a cold beverage in your hand at all times, so that’s the opportunity you’re looking for.  Theme parties might sound like a stretch until we look at the political, economical, and social benefits.

What are the benefits?  The instant political benefit is everyone knows you love America, and that’s a big deal.  The first economical benefit is extending the shelf-life of your jeans.  If you’re jeans are tattered around the ankles or you got a few too many grass stains or stepped in who knows what, just make them into jorts, and save yourself from throwing them out or hiding them in the duldrums of your closet.  The second economical benefit is you won’t have to buy nice beer, because you can’t drink Stella when wearing jorts.  The social benefits are by far the best.  If you’ve followed the rules of jorts-wearing, you’ll be in a great spot.  Socially you’ll be outside enjoying America with cold beverages and having a good time with your friends.  The other benefit is people can’t NOT talk about them.  If you’re with someone where they don’t know what to talk about, I guarantee they'll eventually say “I like your jorts.”  This line isn’t always a compliment, but it’s always a talking point and boom, social benefit.

Jorts may never be fashionable, but they’ll always be comfortable and American.