Tuesday's Tip of the Day #5

Buy drinking glasses with flat bottoms, such that after they're washed in the dishwasher, there is no residual water left in the crevice.

Quotable Mondays #4

Last week's quote will remain anonymous to protect the innocent.

This week:

"I should have dumped her before the dance, so I wouldn't have had to buy that damn flower"

"My" Dog

They say dogs can sense fear.  They say dogs play with the most scared person in the room.  They say the dog is just having fun.  Well I’m not having fun, I’m living a nightmare.

Whenever I’m in a room with a dog, I can promise you I’m the most scared, and any dog can sense it.  I’m not a fan of dogs, they’re not a fan of me.  When I visit a house with a dog, I’m hopeless.  I’ll try to hide the fact that I’m deathly afraid, but the truth is I’m as tense as someone with a two by four up theirs.

Traumatic Moment - I was bit by a dog in 3^rd grade.  I tried to put the bowl of food real close to the dog, and it simply protected its bowl but biting my hand.  I went from a cocky younger brother to a sulking scared little boy.  I remember distinctly looking at the bite mark.  His canine had pierced the fat of my palm, and I looked quickly to survey the damage.  As I stared into my hand I could see my purple muscles and fibers as blood had yet to fill the wound.  I kept looking as if I were seeing a poster from biology class, and as I tried to make sense of the situation, I almost fainted.

Running Encounters - I also run quite often.  Dogs hate intruders and perceive runners as intruders.  Just ask any mailman how dogs treat them.  And I know exactly what they’re talking about.  Now that I run farther than before, I like getting out to rural roads.  You know the scenes with hard packed gravel roads, hay bales, and no electric fences.  Every dog feels obligated to protect their turf.  So they lurk out in the front yards and wait until we’re vulnerable and then hop out and start barking.  I guess they’re alerting their owner that some measly runner is close to the property.  And they don’t leave either.  They bark constantly, and tail you, and all in all pester you.  Some critics claim the dog just wants to play.  Well that’s the last thing I want to do.  I’m just trying to run on a public road bite-free.

From my first bite to every running encounter I have with dogs, our relationship has not improved.  I make it very clear to my friends and acquaintances that I don’t mix well with dogs.  And normally I make the drastic claim that I don’t like dogs.  Almost everyone is completely shocked by this.  Whoa, really, what about (name random dog breed that I don’t know)?  Nope don’t like them either, and they won’t like me.  Well then there’s always someone in the room that says this,

“Well what about my dog? You like my dog, don’t you”

Non-discriminatory - I’m sorry, I don’t.  I don’t discriminate at all.  I don’t like your dog, your neighbor’s dog or anyone else’s dog.  Most people can’t reconcile this.  They can’t fathom how someone could not love their pride and joy as they do.  Well it’s pretty simple.  You’ve built so many memories with your dog, and your dog is nice to you.  It’s the concept that you believe something you own is more special than anything else.  You value the memories and experiences with your thing, and you can’t see why someone else wouldn’t value those as highly as you do.

House Metaphor - It’s comparable to when you’re selling a house.  If you’ve lived in the house for 20 years, you probably love everything about it and overvalue everything.  When in fact, there are still flaws with the house, and the market values the house significantly less than you, because the next owner doesn’t care how many thanksgivings you’ve had there, or that the house has only had one owner since 1980.  It cares about kitchens, bathrooms, and modern appliances.

After someone unwillingly accepts that I’m not a fan of their dog, I tell them that the dog who bit me was “My Dog” to Stephen.  That his dog had never bit anyone before, but his dog had never met me before either.

So treasure the memories you have with “your dog,” but don’t assume that everyone is going to love your dog like you do, especially Miko.

Do you dap, stop, or nod?

Here’s the situation.  You’re walking by yourself around Charlottesville on the sidewalk.  And up ahead, about 20 feet on the same sidewalk, is someone you know walking the opposite direction.  You’re clearly going to cross each other’s path in 10 seconds.  What you do next can shed a lot of light on your relationship status.

Fist Bump – you guys are bros, and you’ll see them around often so no need to carry a conversation, just a simple greeting with a bro fist bump.  Frequent acquaintances.

Man Embrace – close bro.  You used to see this person more often than now, and you’re a little disappointed you don’t see him enough now.  So you show that you guys are still tight by giving him a man hug. Friends.

Head nod – This is the person you meet at parties when you can’t remember names.  You’ve forgotten their name, but now you know you should recognize them.  So you just give them a quick head nod, letting them know, that you do in fact know them.  Friends of friends.

Conversation without stopping – I say it’s a conversation because I’m a guy, but basically each person asks how are you doing, and each responds doing well.  There is no stopping, no slowing of pace, just an on-the-go convo.  One of the two people isn’t interested in a drawn out conversation and might not have the time, so neither slows down.  Marginal female friends.

Double stop – This is where both people stop to give each other the time of day.  They ask a few questions and genuinely act like the care.  After about 3 questions, someone says, well I gotta get to class, see you later.  Ok, bye.  Non-hugging female friends.

Female Embrace – This happens when you see a good friend of yours that you haven’t seen in awhile OR you see a good friend who is a hugger.  (Side note: some girls are huggers, for some reason they like embracing others, and some girls are not.  I’m sure guys are aware of which category their female friends fall into.)  So you give them a nice “so glad to see you” hug, and chat briefly and then move on.  Hugging female friends.

Single stop – This is the trouble area, the situation everyone is trying to avoid.  Where one person stops to chat, and the other person doesn’t slow down at all.  Sometimes this is done intentionally, but more often it’s done unintentionally.  You don’t stop, they do, and by the time you realize it, you’re five feet past them and it’s too late.  Clearly one person wants to chat and the other has more important things to do then spend 2 minutes chatting.  This is quite humilating when you stop and they don't even slow down.  Friendship identity crisis.

Cross the street immediately – this is where you see someone you know, and hope to avoid them.  So you cross the street instantly hoping they haven’t seen you thus avoiding any interaction.  Old ex’s stuck in a high school mentality.

I started this post hoping to give advice on how to read the sidewalk situation and act appropriately to avoid the dreaded single stop, but I’ll leave that for another post.

If you’re ever concerned about your friend status with someone, don’t check Facebook, just walk the other way on the same sidewalk and you’ll figure out all you need to know.

Tuesday's Tip of the Day #4

You should always come 5 minutes early to the first class of every semester, so you don't wind up sitting in a terrible location or on the floor.  (e.g. Econ 201, Com 341)

Quotable Mondays #3

Last Week's winner was Reed Bernick, he was a whiz in class discussions.

This week:

"You know what's gross? I don't remember the last time I showered"

Best Isn't Good Enough

Remember the philosophies of elementary school.  Dream big. If you put your mind to it, you can be whatever you want.  Well eventually, these dreams die.  You thought you could do anything, but then you find out, that not everyone can be a major league ballplayer.  That there are only 30 NBA teams, and there aren’t enough roster spots for everyone who wants to play in NBA.  Or maybe you’re like Dwayne and can’t be a pilot because you’re color blind.  Eventually the harsh reality hits us, and we compromise our dreams.

Now that I got a little off topic, let’s go back to the other elementary philosophy: Give it your best shot.  This is completely true.  Whatever you do, you should give it 100% (I’m a statistics nerd, and you can’t give more than 100%, so I would never say give 110% since it is impossible.)  It’s a waste of your time to do something half-heartedly.  If you commit to something, you better give it your all.

Side rant: How silly does this sound? One of my high school friends took the SAT with almost no preparation just to see how she would do.  She clearly didn’t give her best, nor did she try to give it her best shot.  No matter what, you practically gain nothing from the experience.  Even if you’re happy with your scores, you know you could do better if you tried, so you’ll definitely take them again later, making the first test obsolete.  So by gaining the “experience” of a SAT, you lost the test fee and the whole Saturday you used to take the test.  She’ll agree with me that she kind of regretted it, (I think). Basically, if you don’t give it your best shot, you’ll regret it no matter what you do.

Success - Growing up, our best shot normally works.  If we commit to studying for a spelling test, our best will ace the test.  If we commit for an AP exam, we’ll probably be happy with the results.  If we commit to getting into a certain college, we can probably do it.  But eventually, we commit to something, work hard, and seriously give it our best shot, and then we fail. 

Harsh Reality - That is without a doubt one of the worst feelings in life.  That we failed at something we poured everything into.   That all our hard work, dedication, and preparation wasn’t good enough.  Go watch a high school athlete’s final game, more specifically a committed high school athlete.  So many of them have dedicated their high school career to that sport.  They’ve spent countless hours working and training.  But in their final game, their best isn’t good enough, they lose and their state championships dreams die. (unless you play football at Phoebus).  They come up short, and what further validates to me that it’s the worst feeling in life, is seeing them cry.  Most high school boys never cry, and pride themselves on it.  But when our best isn’t good enough, when we fail in our final game, the harsh reality hits us and many athletes cry.

I’m seeing super talented friends come up short a lot these days.  As a fourth year, everyone is trying to a get that dream job and a nice salary.  Many students pour their lives into these resumes, cover letters, and interviews and hope to land their dream job.  But dream jobs are in short supply, and many super talented and super qualified people fail.  They’re told that, we know you gave it your best, but today your best isn’t good enough.

So give it your best, and pray that your best will be good enough.  But understand that giving your best does not guarantee that you’ll be good enough, and it’s just a devastating fact of life.