Do you dap, stop, or nod?

Here’s the situation.  You’re walking by yourself around Charlottesville on the sidewalk.  And up ahead, about 20 feet on the same sidewalk, is someone you know walking the opposite direction.  You’re clearly going to cross each other’s path in 10 seconds.  What you do next can shed a lot of light on your relationship status.

Fist Bump – you guys are bros, and you’ll see them around often so no need to carry a conversation, just a simple greeting with a bro fist bump.  Frequent acquaintances.

Man Embrace – close bro.  You used to see this person more often than now, and you’re a little disappointed you don’t see him enough now.  So you show that you guys are still tight by giving him a man hug. Friends.

Head nod – This is the person you meet at parties when you can’t remember names.  You’ve forgotten their name, but now you know you should recognize them.  So you just give them a quick head nod, letting them know, that you do in fact know them.  Friends of friends.

Conversation without stopping – I say it’s a conversation because I’m a guy, but basically each person asks how are you doing, and each responds doing well.  There is no stopping, no slowing of pace, just an on-the-go convo.  One of the two people isn’t interested in a drawn out conversation and might not have the time, so neither slows down.  Marginal female friends.

Double stop – This is where both people stop to give each other the time of day.  They ask a few questions and genuinely act like the care.  After about 3 questions, someone says, well I gotta get to class, see you later.  Ok, bye.  Non-hugging female friends.

Female Embrace – This happens when you see a good friend of yours that you haven’t seen in awhile OR you see a good friend who is a hugger.  (Side note: some girls are huggers, for some reason they like embracing others, and some girls are not.  I’m sure guys are aware of which category their female friends fall into.)  So you give them a nice “so glad to see you” hug, and chat briefly and then move on.  Hugging female friends.

Single stop – This is the trouble area, the situation everyone is trying to avoid.  Where one person stops to chat, and the other person doesn’t slow down at all.  Sometimes this is done intentionally, but more often it’s done unintentionally.  You don’t stop, they do, and by the time you realize it, you’re five feet past them and it’s too late.  Clearly one person wants to chat and the other has more important things to do then spend 2 minutes chatting.  This is quite humilating when you stop and they don't even slow down.  Friendship identity crisis.

Cross the street immediately – this is where you see someone you know, and hope to avoid them.  So you cross the street instantly hoping they haven’t seen you thus avoiding any interaction.  Old ex’s stuck in a high school mentality.

I started this post hoping to give advice on how to read the sidewalk situation and act appropriately to avoid the dreaded single stop, but I’ll leave that for another post.

If you’re ever concerned about your friend status with someone, don’t check Facebook, just walk the other way on the same sidewalk and you’ll figure out all you need to know.