Quotable Mondays #7

If your offense is apathy, what is their defense?

Let it Snow...

Growing up isn’t fun.  It changes your perspective on so many things.  Halloween, Fridays, and Spring Break go through radically changes as we grow up.  Halloween is a great holiday as a kid, stinks as a high schooler, makes a strong comeback in college and fades to irrelevancy in the adult world.  Fridays are nothing special growing up, date night in high school, fun Fridays in college, and another 8+ hour workday as an adult.  Spring break is a welcome reprieve in high school, absolutely necessary in college, and non-existent in the adult world.  Depending on our stage in life, we perceive things differently.

Here I sit, feeling like a grandma watching the snow magically dance to the ground piling up like a white blanket.  And thinking how precious it is to watch mother nature in all its splendor.  As I get lost imagining Narnia coming to life right outside my window, I’m reminded of my checklist for Sunday, and how “watch the snow” was never on it.  I’m reminded with each passing minute when I’m not studying that I won’t get that time back, and just hoping the accounting test isn’t difficult…

Remember the good ole days.  When it was bedtime, aka 930, and snow had just began to stick on the deck.  You would run to the window, look out, and gleefully come back, constantly checking and rechecking the accumulation.  And once there was a significant amount (1/4 inch), you knew schools were closed, and tomorrow would one of the best days of the year, a snow day.  Where have those days gone?

Snow today means it will be super cold outside, classes will go on as scheduled.  No deadlines will be pushed back.  No tests will be avoided.  There will be no neighborhood snowball fights.  Nor snow cream.  All that will happen is we’ll have to trudge through snow to class as scheduled feeling tired, miserable, and old.

No matter what walking to class to take a test is miserable whether you studied enough or not, so you might as well enjoy a front row seat to a snowstorm now, because you never know when they’ll happen again.

You’re fast becoming the person you’re going to be

Often times, we like to imagine the person we’re going to be later.  Later is very broad and can mean later as in when we go to college..., when we have a job..., when we live on our own..., or when we’re married... 

I know I used to imagine these things, and I would naturally take a very optimistic viewpoint of myself and not imagine the baggage or problems I currently have in my life.  I figured I’d have them all fixed or figured out by then, like a fresh start.  It was as if the person I was picturing wasn’t even exactly me, that it was instead a new and completely different person.  The sad truth is that doesn’t happen.  You never get to press reset in life or wipe away all your problems by crossing a milestone in your life.  Instead, you realize you’re quickly becoming the person you’re going to be.

Do you think husbands have similar problems as college kids?  Your first thought might be “of course not,” they’re two completely different people.  Slightly incorrect, that person who is a husband now was a college kid before.  They don’t have to be two different people, just two different stages.  The problems we have stick with the person and are not confined to a certain stage of life.  If you have anger problems in college, have shallow relationships, or you want every girl you see, those problems don’t go away just because you have a ring.  You’re still going to battle all those issues daily.  You can’t change the person just by changing the situation.

Our person and personality is continuous at all points of our life.  Change can happen, but it happens slowly and must be catalyzed by an interior motive.  Just because we move into a different stage in our life doesn’t mean our personality drastically changes all of a sudden.  We’re still the same person we were with the same great qualities and same glaring flaws. 

So today, in this moment, think about the person you want to be.  What does that person do or say?  How do they treat their friends, family, and acquaintances?  Now, think about the person you are today.  If today, you’re not the person you want to be, when is that change going to happen?  And sadly it doesn’t happen just by growing older as most people think.

Tuesday's Tip of the Day #7

Don't Lie

Quotable Mondays #6

Last week's was Sam Hawkins

This week:

"I had to read a 700 page book on the grain prices in Southern France.  It changed my life."

Krispy Kreme Challenge

On February 4^th I did these things:

1.       Ran 2.5 Miles, Ate 12 Krispy Kreme Doughnuts, Ran 2.5 Miles

2.       Threw up all over the finish line

3.       Ate 13 more Krispy Kreme Doughnuts.

Wait, I lied.  I actually didn’t do all those things.  I never threw up.  I saw a bunch of others fail the challenge, but I didn’t.

The Krispy Kreme challenge is a race that combines some of my specialties.  Running, eating, and free Krispy Kreme doughnuts.  The challenge is pretty simple.

• Run from the bell tower to the Krispy Kreme store. (2.5 miles)
• Eat a dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts
• Run back (2.5 miles)
• Complete it in under an hour and don’t vomit.

I’ve done this the past two years, and it’s been an amazing time.  In fact, everything leading up to the trip is amazing and I’ll share why.

Training - In the month leading up to the race, I can use the race as an excuse for my terrible eating habits.  Miko, is that you’re third slice of Runk pizza? Ya, I’m training.  Why are eating so fast? I’m training.  Why did you bring a box of doughnuts to cross-country practice? I’m training.  Are you seriously just going to eat those doughnuts while we actually run?  I’m training, and the eating part is the most important.  So no matter what you’re doing, you can always bring up the race and fit it into your training regime.

Adventures - Also, any trip to North Carolina is awesome.  North Carolina always has warmer weather and encourages adventures.  We thought we would ride through State’s (in North Carolina, State means NC State) campus.  Boy, were we wrong!  We wanted to turn right at three consecutively intersections, but they were all one way streets.  So we went where North Carolina wanted us to go, Pullen Park.  We saw it off the side of the road.  Basically, it was an amusement park for 8 year olds.  And yes we definitely went and played on their swing sets, and felt like 3^rd graders again.

In the previous race, North Carolina drew us to a party.  At the hotel where we were staying, Ashley was having her sweet 16 birthday party.  We dropped by.  It didn’t matter that we had no idea who Ashley was or were 5 years older than everybody there , it was where North Carolina wanted us to go.

Spoils - The next great thing about the Krispy Kreme race is the free doughnuts afterward.  Almost everyone else has developed a taste aversion to doughnuts by then, but not us.  We simply drive back to the store, and there are trash bags full of unopened untouched boxes.  Probably 15 trash bags with 15 boxes of 12 doughnuts.  That’s about 2400 doughnuts, for free.  So obviously we grab two trash bags and drive home with about 400 doughnuts for free.  The next week we get to test our economic diminshing marginal utility theory.  Since the cost of eating another doughnut is practically 0, when will we stop eating?  As it turns out, our apartment eats doughnuts like we're trapped in a doughnut store and have to eat our way out.

Cookout - And the final amazing thing about the challenge is eating at Cookout.  Cookout is a North Carolina staple serving inexpensive American food out their windows for years.  A trip to Cookout not only completes the unhealthy trip, but makes you love the simpler times in the South.

The Krispy Kreme Challenge guarantees an unhealthy, adventurous trip every year with plenty of “free” calories.

Does your car have these items?

I come from a very practical family.  My dad is a constant planner.   One of my brothers is an accountant.  They love minimizing risk by planning and sometimes overplanning.  They understand that our time is a precious commodity, and we hate wasting time doing unnecessary things.  So I’m a by-product of my family, and I fully believe in the precautions we set up for each of our vehicles.

Let’s apply this minimizing risk theme to cars.  Cars are a huge mystery to me.  I feel like there was a "man" class I missed in middle school where they taught every guy how to change the oil, what makes a hemi engine different, and what fuel-injected means.  I don’t know any of those things.  I do know that I can pay money to have my oil changed and that hemis and fuel injected something costs more money (what’s up Comm School).

Anyway, I’ve learned that there are 4 things I need in every car to minimize risk.  To minimize the fact that I might waste my time due to car trouble that I should have avoided.

Jumper Cables - The first problem to mitigate is when a car won’t move.  So make sure you have jumper cables in your car.  So if the battery is beat, you can hail a friend or parking lot neighbor and hopefully get your car back in action.  Or you can help out a friend or someone you want to be your friend (nudge nudge) when they ask if you have jumper cables, or at the very worst you can be a good Samaritan to someone.

Flashlight - The next thing you should have in your car is a flashlight.  As trivial as this sounds, it is all kinds of practical when its dark and you’re in trouble.  Whether you’re looking under the hood of your car, or when your dad threw his state championship ring out the window, or when you’re hiking down humpback rock after watching the sunset.  In all those situations, a flashlight comes in pretty handy.

State Map - You should also have a state map in your car.  This thing helps all the time.  Especially, as we get older and our friends start branching out.  I understand the GPS is replacing this item, but I worry that we’re becoming too dependent on the GPS.  Like I’ve met people that don’t even know how to fold a map yet alone read it.  Have a map, and brush up on your skills, because it will help you.

Hide-a-Key - Finally, and most importantly, get a hide-a-key for your car.  This is the story I hear far too often from my friends.

You won’t believe what happened to me…I was out late at night (or on vacation) and I locked myself out of my car at the worst possible time.

Any time you’re locked out of your car is the worst possible time.  No one thinks to themselves, you know what, if I locked myself out of my car right now, I wouldn’t mind.  There are approximately zero situations where that makes sense, and definitely zero if you’re alone.

“You won’t believe…”  No I definitely will believe if you don’t have a hide-a-key.  It happens to all of us.  Our system gets messed up, things are out of order, we're confused.  And boom, worst possible time.  Well if you have a hide-a-key, this situation will never happen.  And trust me if you get locked out of your car just once and you already invested in a hide-a-key, it’s more than paid for itself.

So plan ahead, minimize your risk, put jumper cables, a state map, a flashlight, and a hide-a-key in your car and you’ll thank me later.

Tuesday's Tip of the Day #6

Do not schedule a class directly after a phys ed class.

Everyone will be happier.

Quotable Mondays #5

"I'm just going ground it up and brown it"

>That's what she said...

Best Relationship Advice

Getting golfing advice is ironic because the golfers who should be giving you advice never do, and the golfers that have never broken 100 love to tell you how to fix your slice.  I’m pretty sure the dating world is no different, where people with no business giving advice love to tell you how to live your life.  But anyway, I’m going to offer my best piece of advice to anyone going through relationship issues.  Mind you, I’m probably the golfer who hasn’t broken 100, since I haven’t dated in, well, awhile.

“No matter what, you have to do what’s right for you”

Insider Perspective - It’s so hard to make the correct decision when you’re directly involved.  From an outsider perspective, it’s so much easier, normally a black and white decision.  But when you’re involved there are so many other variables in play, idiosyncrasies, and so many emotions.  Sometimes it’s almost impossible to sort through the fluff to find the right information you need to decide what to do.

Timeline Planning - Often times when you’re considering a break-up, you try to foresee the problems that will develop.  Oh I shouldn’t do this now because Valentine’s day is coming up or her birthday or prom.  Or she has my CD’s or my favorite hoodie and I need to get those back before I call it quits.  This is clearly terrible logic.  However, in the heat of moment you might even make these arguments and defend them.  “Let me just wait until after Valentine’s Day…”  Worrying about trivial future events should not affect your decision today.  If you’re only waiting for an opportune time to break up, you’re really just disrespecting her by dragging her along.  If the break up happens sooner, then the recovery happens sooner too.

Sunk Costs - Other times, people will defend irrational points.  Many times these will be sunk costs in their decisions.  Well I just gave her this gift.  Well, we kind of sloppily made out.  Or I just met her parents.  Don’t kid yourself into thinking sunk costs should affect your future behavior.  Just because you spent money on her or kissed her while you were drunk doesn’t mean you should keep dragging her along.

Stinkin’ Emotions - Another reason someone gets sidetracked in the decision making process is they let their emotions get in the way.  They care too much for how it will affect the other person.  She’ll be crushed, and crying inconsolably and I don’t know if I can deal with that.  I also don’t want to be the person who caused that.  Sorry buddy, if you don’t want to break a girl’s heart, then don’t take it.  Sadly, she will be crushed and you’ll feel terrible for making a girl cry.  But if it wasn’t right for you, don’t fake it, it only makes it worse.  And eventually the girl will thank you too because it would have been worse to continue to fake it.  Finally, girls will understand that it’s better to have loved and lost then to have never have loved at all.

Dealing with emotions and relationships stink.  Making hard decisions stink.  Hurting someone else stinks.  But in the end you have to do what’s right for you no matter how bad it feels.  Because if you’ve thought about it, it’s what’s best for the long term.